But Only If You Let Them
Disclaimer: This poem belongs to me.
You take a deep breath and hold it in
Teetering dangerously on the
edge
The small island you're standing on in your mind is shrinking
And you
don't know which way to swim
One side's dark and foreboding
While the
other is happy and bright
You feel yourself swaying towards the former of the
two
But then you feel a hand pulling you away
You turn
You recognize
the face
You smile
You pull away from that hand
You don't deserve
it
They always say you do
But you don't believe them
You feel that
you're disgusting
Marred
Maimed
Hideous compared to them
You feel
the self-hatred stir
Pushing you closer to the edge of suicide
But the
hand clings to you
It wont let you leave
It won't accept no for an
answer
'I want you'
It says
'You're beautiful'
It says
'I love
you'
It says
'Stay with me'
It says
But you won't listen
You know
you love the person who won't let you go
But you think they don't know how
you really
feel
Depressed
Broken
Empty
Hated
Suicidal
Pained
Stressed
Disgusting
You
feel the pain of leaving them more than the knife through your own skin
Even
though you think they'll be better off without you
You already feel
dead
Though you hide behind fake smiles and stupid lies
You hate being
this way
Being fake
You always thought you never pull away from that
hand
Your only savior
But you don't know any more
You find yourself
wondering
'Will they love the real me as much as the fake one?'
Or
'Do
they really love me?'
You wonder if they can tell you're in pain
Never
actually smiling
You wonder if they can see them
Your thoughts of
suicide
On the bridge of doubt
You think
'Maybe, just maybe, they
know.'
And
'Maybe they just won't tell me.'
Tentitivly
You take a
step forward
Towards the hand
It grabs you as soon as you're within
reach
But it doesn't pull this time
You both stay where you are
Not
wanting to separate just yet
You know you'll have to
But you can't right
now
You realize that even if they'd be better off
You're to selfish to
leave
You plant your feet firmly on what's left of the tiny island
Well
aware that you'll never be truly 'happy' any more
But with them you can get
close
With them you can feel 'good'
Almost like you used to
And
maybe
Just maybe
They can pull you out of your past
And into the
light
Steal you away from the self-hatred and darkness festering in your
soul
But only if you let them
You take a deep breath and hold it in
Teetering dangerously on the
edge
The small island you're standing on in your mind is shrinking
And you
don't know which way to swim
One side's dark and foreboding
While the
other is happy and bright
You feel yourself swaying towards the former of the
two
But then you feel a hand pulling you away
You turn
You recognize
the face
You smile
You pull away from that hand
You don't deserve
it
They always say you do
But you don't believe them
You feel that
you're disgusting
Marred
Maimed
Hideous compared to them
You feel
the self-hatred stir
Pushing you closer to the edge of suicide
But the
hand clings to you
It wont let you leave
It won't accept no for an
answer
'I want you'
It says
'You're beautiful'
It says
'I love
you'
It says
'Stay with me'
It says
But you won't listen
You know
you love the person who won't let you go
But you think they don't know how
you really
feel
Depressed
Broken
Empty
Hated
Suicidal
Pained
Stressed
Disgusting
You
feel the pain of leaving them more than the knife through your own skin
Even
though you think they'll be better off without you
You already feel
dead
Though you hide behind fake smiles and stupid lies
You hate being
this way
Being fake
You always thought you never pull away from that
hand
Your only savior
But you don't know any more
You find yourself
wondering
'Will they love the real me as much as the fake one?'
Or
'Do
they really love me?'
You wonder if they can tell you're in pain
Never
actually smiling
You wonder if they can see them
Your thoughts of
suicide
On the bridge of doubt
You think
'Maybe, just maybe, they
know.'
And
'Maybe they just won't tell me.'
Tentitivly
You take a
step forward
Towards the hand
It grabs you as soon as you're within
reach
But it doesn't pull this time
You both stay where you are
Not
wanting to separate just yet
You know you'll have to
But you can't right
now
You realize that even if they'd be better off
You're to selfish to
leave
You plant your feet firmly on what's left of the tiny island
Well
aware that you'll never be truly 'happy' any more
But with them you can get
close
With them you can feel 'good'
Almost like you used to
And
maybe
Just maybe
They can pull you out of your past
And into the
light
Steal you away from the self-hatred and darkness festering in your
soul
But only if you let them